When you get to my point in life you get so used to the everyday routine, all you have to do is focus on what is going wrong, or what you are missing, who you are missing. This is something I plan to change. I need to refocus.
My heart has always been driven to foster. I have always told myself I would adopt and or foster children in need. With my job, and life style I have always had this feeling I will not get to have kids of my own. No idea why, just always a feeling I have had. Part of me believes that is why God places me with jobs where I am able to help raise the kids as my own. Either way, I feel like there is so much love in my heart that needs to be shared and so many kids with childhoods so much worse than my own that need to be loved so that they can see the potential they deserve.
Given my lifestyle right now I have not been able to do so. I made myself a few promises when it came to finally fostering, the biggest was that I would be able to dedicate to the child. I would be able to provide for the child/children. I do not want to take on a child if I can not afford it. I know that when you foster you are given an allowance but I do not want to depend on that allowance. I want to put that money into a savings bond for the child when they are older.
Lately I have channeled that energy into helping animals when I can because I can not help children. It has been very rewarding because the animals have come from very bad situations but it just breaks my heart and makes me wish I could do more.
After talking to a friend that was staying with me we discussed my desire and my dream and since then I have been researching short term, emergency, and pre-adoption foster care. With that I will be able to full fill my desire but not the commitment of the full term foster that I really want to do. Any body ever watch one tree hill where Brooke fostered the baby that came to American for a heart surgery and then went back home. I want to do something like that. With something like that I can still fit it into my work schedule hopefully and still in between have my daily life and school routine.
Tomorrow I will spend my day writing a horrible paper and after that is finished I will allow myself to dream and plan this new journey. I am beyond excited!
My heart has always been driven to foster. I have always told myself I would adopt and or foster children in need. With my job, and life style I have always had this feeling I will not get to have kids of my own. No idea why, just always a feeling I have had. Part of me believes that is why God places me with jobs where I am able to help raise the kids as my own. Either way, I feel like there is so much love in my heart that needs to be shared and so many kids with childhoods so much worse than my own that need to be loved so that they can see the potential they deserve.
Given my lifestyle right now I have not been able to do so. I made myself a few promises when it came to finally fostering, the biggest was that I would be able to dedicate to the child. I would be able to provide for the child/children. I do not want to take on a child if I can not afford it. I know that when you foster you are given an allowance but I do not want to depend on that allowance. I want to put that money into a savings bond for the child when they are older.
Lately I have channeled that energy into helping animals when I can because I can not help children. It has been very rewarding because the animals have come from very bad situations but it just breaks my heart and makes me wish I could do more.
After talking to a friend that was staying with me we discussed my desire and my dream and since then I have been researching short term, emergency, and pre-adoption foster care. With that I will be able to full fill my desire but not the commitment of the full term foster that I really want to do. Any body ever watch one tree hill where Brooke fostered the baby that came to American for a heart surgery and then went back home. I want to do something like that. With something like that I can still fit it into my work schedule hopefully and still in between have my daily life and school routine.
Tomorrow I will spend my day writing a horrible paper and after that is finished I will allow myself to dream and plan this new journey. I am beyond excited!
